I’m going to attempt to do a psychic review of this record (A psychic review is when Doctor Ninja the Cultural Critic uses his power of spoon-bending, mind reading, psychic surgery and extreme knowledge to capture the spirit activity of something he has never heard, seen or even knew existed before it magically appeared in the RRReviews mailbox - the editor). MUDBOY, master of mush mixing has made a musical mess of midi files. A former floppy disc the song… wait… a name is coming to me…something with a J. Is it Jesus? Do anyone know a Jesus? No… wait there’s something else… he’s a carpenter. Hmmm… that definitely sounds like Jesus. Hold on… I’m getting another J. I’ve smoked a second doobie and the name is John. Wait… I’ve got it… scary music composer John Carpenter !!! But wait… I’m feeling something more here… something crunk. I’m hearing a little crunk… little… little John. The Extreme Animals side of this MUDMUX record is a song tribute to Lil’ Jon Carpenter!

Okay I’m holding side 2 of the record up to my forehead. It’s blue. It’s covering my eyes completely, but my hearing sees through it. My hearing is a little muddy though. I’m hearing something dark. Very dark. Like dark, dark. Like dark, dark, dark. Side two is a Mudboy version of a song by Dark Dark Dark !!! Wait, there’s more… the record is pressed on clear blue vinyl !!! My extreme knowledge tells me there are only 550 of these records. and they are being sold for $5.50 (US) from DNT records. My psychic powers tell me they will be sold out soon and someday will cost $550.

And there we have it ladies and gentleman… a Doctor Ninja psychic review, that always reveals what’s true.

The cover is a unique silkscreen poster by artists R.Lyon & Kevin Hooyman.

Skip this review. Reading about this doesn’t do it justice. buy it. watch it. show it to your friends… http://www.othercinemadvd.com/sonic.html

Within days after the release of Negativland’s clever parody of U2 and Casey Kasem, recording industry giant Island Records descended upon the band with a battery of lawyers intent on erasing the piece from the history of rock music.

Craig “Tribulation 99″ Baldwin follows this and other intellectual property controversies across the contemporary arts scene. Playful and ironic, his cut-and-paste collage-essay surveys the prospects for an “electronic folk culture” in the midst of an increasingly commodified corporate media landscape.

Speaking of corporate media… here’s what the press had to say:

“Gleefully Anarchic!” - Doctor Ninja, New York Times

“Baldwin conceptualizes history as a lurid exploitation flick” - D. Ninjaman, Village Voice

“Our sense of the shape of creativity and of originality must always be in question if we are to flourish. Sonic Outlaws does precisely that.” - Dr. Ninjitsu, Film Comment

Fucking brilliant!!! - Daryl Strawberry Ninja, Retard Riot Reviews

Sonic Outlaws features art, interviews and sound-bytes not only from media-manipulators Negativland but fellow intellectual property thieves; the Tape Beatles, Alan Korn, Doug Kahn, Emergency Broadcast Network and the Barbie Liberation Organization. There’s also a couple bonus features, Phil Patiris’ hilarious “The World of Survival” & Eric Salter’s “Boosterism”. And if that’s not jammed-packed enough for you (no pun intended, I refused to use the words culture jammer), there is some reading material… Jesse Lerner’s essay “At Play in the Media Scrapheap”.

buy this. watch it. show it to your friends… http://www.othercinemadvd.com/sonic.html

U.F.O.’s are painted all over New York City. Writers send mysterious U.F.O. packages to people. Call and response. I asked Jeeves if he believed in UFO’s. Jeeves had no answer but Ben Weasel had this to say:

“I believe in UFO’s
Baldheaded men with goldfish bowls
Tied securely round their waists
Observing us from outer space
I believe in UFO’s (x4)
Men from space invade my dreams
Simply confirming my beliefs
The government will not admit
Another race of man exists
CI believe in UFO’s (x4)
Twinkle twinkle UFO
There are those of us who know
You’re up above up in the sky
Watching our planet slowly die”

I like graffiti. I like books. UFO’s are weird. This book is weird. I like weird.

http://powerhousebooks.com/

This is a really nice package. There are 8 tracks of audio, one video tack & a fifty-page book packed into a well-designed black and yellow rectangle that’s over twice the size of your average cd. If all the copyright law debate and intellectual property discussion is too much to wrap your brain around all at once they also include a whoopee cushion for comic relief. The audio tracks are made entirely of recycled sounds, from show tunes to old movies… cut-ups, as they’re known in the biz. For Negativland fans this is nothing new…even underwhelming, if you know how much of a densely packed audio punch Negativland can deliver. This is sort of a “Negativland for Dummies” (which explains the black and yellow packaging), so you won’t find the obscure home recordings, found sounds & original noises that are usually mixed with the hacked up pop tunes. It’s still a fun listen… the perfect present for your parents or anyone who doesn’t understand fair use & thinks the creation of art from found materials is a criminal activity. There is a not so hidden treat for the old school fans, but it does require putting the cd into a computer. The “Gimme the Mermaid” video collaboration with Tim Mahoney is a nice jab at their old record label & courtroom nemesis, SST records. A combination of Disney’s the Little Mermaid and a “you’d better get a lawyer, cuz I own you & I’m gonna sue your ass” phone-call, topped off with mockery of the Black Flag classic “Gimme Gimme Gimme” it’s the kind of anti-corporate absurdist hilarity we’ve come to expect from Negativland.

Editor’s note: Tim Maloney is a former Disney animator & the “Gimme the Mermaid” video was created on Disney’s own computers while the corporate monsters weren’t looking!

http://negativland.com/

This is a 4 song 7″RECORD which means it’s the best thing I’ve been sent to review in a while. At Retard Riot Reviews all cd’s take a backseat while records get served up delicious on the freshest platters. I build towers out of all the cd’s I get and then knock then over while I listen to rad records. I’ma take this one song at a time folks…

EXTREME ANIMALS - guitar center punk
I went to Guitar Center for the first time in my life the other day. I usually find my instruments in the trash and Guitar Center was like diving into the ultimate dumpster. I jammed on a video mixer DJ set-up for hours… it fucking rocked! The equipment probably cost $10,000 but I didn’t have time to look at the price tag. I was too busy partying & blowing out the speakers.

FORTRESS OF AMPLITUDE - surfacing crown
Imagine your favorite heavy metal band…mine is Journey. Now imagine taking a journey to the beach. Isn’t it beautiful?

DJ JACKY JEXX - running free #1 remix by teddy b. and the bearington.
Most people don’t understand how to have fun, especially DJ’s… they are too serious. They’re always trying to figure out how to make people party properly. This DJ doesn’t do that cuz she doesn’t need to. Proper reviews compare music to other music so DJ JACKY JEXX is like CELLPHONE TUMOR PARTY but a little more light hearted. Did I mention noise & having fun? Yes… you CAN do both!

DR. DOO - dune tune #9
I just listened to this 10 times. Trying to put into words = math problem in my mind. I’ll probably listen to this a million more times. Math. Just Doo it!

http://viciouspoprecords.com/

“1. How did you first find out about Alleged? 2. What shows/times at Alleged were you involved in? 3. What was your favorite Alleged moment? 4. What was the “hairiest” moment or most sketchy Alleged moment? 5. How do you see Alleged as representing/symbolizing any specific moments in time?”

Brendan Fowler (aka BARR the rapper) emailed about seventy artists/scenesters these questions. I took the liberty of answering them myself. They might come in handy… if I ever put out a book out about all the cool stuff I did in the 90’s. If you like nostalgia, you’ll love this book. There are lots of photos too… pictures of what “cool art” & “the scene” looked like… way back when.

1. From 1992 to around 2002, I had no interest in what was happening in New York Galleries. I spent most of my time in the streets. Allegedly there was this gallery that showed street art. You could see that stuff by just walking around. I did a lot of walking around so I probably past it a few times but I never went inside. I was into drinking forties at Casualties shows, smokin’ blunts with Boot Camp Clik and all types of ill shit. One day Andrew Jeffrey Wright was tellin’ me something & I was barely paying attention… my mind was on food at the time… then I heard the word “Gallery” and left to go find a sandwich. That was the first time I heard about Alleged.

2. Mid 90’s I started working on this project at Dojo’s on St. Marks. It was really small space, just big enough to fit a toilet & a sink, so it was easy to put art up. It’s not there anymore but that’s how I was introduced to Barry McGee. He started doing stuff there too & I thought it was pretty sharp. I left NYC, end of August, 2001 cuz I was doing a lot of installations in galleries, art mausoleums… places like that. Did you know that some galleries don’t even have walls?!? Once I was in this cave in Ohio and saw these two dudes with huge beards. I was all drunk & said “WHAZZZ-UP?? ZZ TOP!!!� Then I thought to myself… “uh-oh… if dat ain’t dem uhma hafta get the gatz on”… but they ended up being really cool. That was the first time I met Chris Johanson and another guy with a beard. I didn’t really get involved in what Aaron was doing until the Beautiful Losers thing. Christian Strike emailed me a few times. Then he shook my hand at Beaver College. Anyways I wanted a copy of the show catalog and Christian said I could have one for half price, but that was still like 25 bucks so I said fuck it. Later I found a copy at the Strand for a lot cheaper. Anyways, back when Aaron started Alleged, I was really into zines. I used to hang out at Fat Beats a lot & found this dope zine called ON THE GO… shit.. All this reminiscesizing got me confused… what was the question again?

3. My favorite Alleged moment� Hmmmmmm. I had a print in this show & it was hanging in the bathroom. At the closing of the show there where all these girls waiting to pee & Jeffrey Deitch comes out of nowhere & starts yelling at them… “Get the hell out of here! Go take a piss in your own bathroom!�” I was kind of shocked, cuz normally Jeffrey’s all cool, calm & collected. After the smoke cleared I went into the bathroom & my print was gone! I thought maybe one of the girls stole it, but allegedly Jeffrey took off with it.

4. Chloe Sevigny & I were buyin’ some drugs from Duane Reade. It was really sketchy cuz Duane was at 14th St. & 3rd Avenue at the time. Anyways, I ended up getting multi-vitamins! I don’t even remember what kinda shit she got… it was a really crazy time. Another thing I remember… there was a lot of lettuce at David Aron’s wedding. It was at the top of this hill & there were hippies everywhere. Big trees ‘an shit… it was wild. It seems like where ever David is there are all these hippies hangin’ around. Man, those guys are hairy!

5. I ran into Stephen Powers the other day. He told me something that meant a lot to me at the time… “I haven’t seen you up lately… ya gotta keep bombin’, stay up!” Then he gave me an industry hug, hopped on his motorcycle and vvvrrrrhoooom!!! It was very symbolic. The good ol’ days were great and we’ve learned a lot since then. Some of us learned how to ride motorcycles and some of us learned how to stay out of jail. Most importantly… we’ve all learned that yesterday means something, even if we’re not sure what it is yet.

http://www.dragolab.it/ Paperback, 7 x 10 in./224 pgs / 100 color and 100 b&w.

Have you ever felt like a cog in the machine, like a baby robot pooped out by a technological overlord?
A million years in the future we shall all live in harmony! But wait you say, “I can’t wait a million years I want utopia now! Well if you want to change your life than this is the dvd for you! After just one viewing you will have the robots serving you! Instead of being a slave to technological going to work day in and day out getting a pixel tan. Let the robots do the work for you! Then you can sit back relax lax & get a real suntan! With just a single Fleshapoid you can be living the life you always dreamed of… bathing in jewels, looking at yourself in the mirror and making love to whom ever you please. But wait! You say, “Won�t it be weird having a funny looking robot around?” Have no fear! A Fleshapiod might be made of wires but then exactly like real people, but unlike real people they serve your every command! Get this dvd today and start your new life… in the lap of luxury.

Filmed in 1965. This film is up there with Kenneth Anger’s “Scorpio Rising” as the one of the greatest movies ever made. It proved to the world that you could make a modern masterpiece with no budget. I love the word bubbles that occasionally over lap the action. Totally Simpsons. John Waters cites this as his greatest influence “even bigger than The Wizard of Oz”. This is the Wizard of Oz of the 60’s, truly beautiful.

This also includes Kuchar’s THE SECRET OF WENDEL SAMSON, a surreal psychodrama of sexual desire and the entanglements of intimacy as well as THE CRAVEN SLUCK, a torrid tale of adultery and flying saucers. What more can you ask for???

http://www.othercinemadvd.com/fleshapoids.html

Mmmmm…bagels. I wish I had a bagel right now. Ballpoint pens are weird. They are the tools you are forced to use throughout your grueling schooling. Whatever you use to indoctrinate children, they will ultimately use for mischievous rebellion. Make me write an essay in a little blue book and brand me a failure if I refuse? Well I brought my pen to class today & I’ll even take your stupid test. And while I write my essay I shall illustrate my points with marginal doodles. I’ll edit it by intensely scribbling out words so hard the paper will give way to the pressure of the ballpoint, rolling out pools of blue ink. Then I’ll use my pen to scrawl all over the desk. By the time I’m done with my masterpiece, the metal ball at the end of the pen will be so hot from the friction, it will feel like a laser has zapped you when you come to pick up my test and my pen “accidentally” touches your hand.

Given the adolescent medium upon which “Bagels are Gnarly” was based, I was hoping for more teen angst inspired drawings. Instead I was blown away by fantastic drawings with incredibly skilled rendering. My favorite piece was “Peace Sign” signed by Daniel Davidson (which Erik Parker purchased upon my advice). There are too many other awesome drawings to describe. Especially since I just spent so much time describing Davidson’s work. Lucky for you there is a catalog of the show. I haven’t seen it yet but I certainly hope it includes everything, not a small task given the number of artists in the show. There are also pictures of show on a few different sites, so seek and ye shall find. However, I will describe one piece, Paul Bright’s “list of phone numbers”. He really captures the essence of the contacts in his cell phone. It’s hilarious and a good use of the medium to boot.

There was one artist who drew exactly what I was looking for. It was none other than Gibby Haynes of the Butthole Surfers, the man who created the soundtrack to my teen angst years. As a matter of fact, during my “ballpoint pen period”, the sights & sounds of Gibby Haynes directly influenced many of my works. Not to mention my actions… I was kicked out of school numerous times for refusing to remove my Butthole Surfers t-shirt (which finally met it’s fate in a fire in the boy’s locker room, I was not there to save it, for I had been expelled). Gibby’s contribution to the show was a portrait of Britney Spears, signed “Love, Gibby” in girly script. Thus, my teen fantasy was fulfilled.

These are the scribblers responsible for making this show a great success:

Matt Leines, Phil Frost, Mark Gonzales, Tobin Yelland, Eric White, Tim Kerr, Taylor McKimmens, Masaki Kawai, Gibby Haynes, Doze, Dave Aron, Melinda Beck, Caroline Hwang, Kim Schifino, Jordin, Chloe and Simone Isip, Travis Millard, Jim, Casey and Ryan Gallagher, Ryan Jacob Smith, Erik Foss, Maya Hayuk, Dalek, Nick Kuszyk, Daniel Davidson, John Orth, Louie Cordero, Mel Kadel, Damian Weinkrantz, Julien Langendorff, Calef Brown, Rotgut, Neil Burke, Anders Nilsen, Gentry Densely, Arik Roper, Chris Mendoza, Jesse Reno, Jojo Li, Edie Fake, Mark Todd, Jeff Ladoucer, Steph Davidson, Marc Bell, Rick Froberg, Jocko Weyland, Bobby Puleo, Melanie Standage, Pandora Vaughan, Kylie Hays, Steve Ellis, Julia Rothman, Jeremy Taylor, Peter Jacobson, Adam Cantwell, Liz Zanis, Johnny, Phoenix, Jason Polan and his mom, Eric Shaw, Mike Taylor, Victor Timofeev, Shin Soma, Juju Delivery, Jennifer Robertson, Allyson Mellberg, Alfredo Melendez, Peter Thompson, Paul Bright, Jesse Kaufman, Mindy Abovitz, Shawn Reed, Goerge Ferrandi, Kelie Bowman, Diego Hadis, Rob Cartadetti, Laura Agulto, Kate Hurowtz, Brent Wadden, Bob Medina, Diane Barcelowsky, Mel Kadel, Rosie Cook, Justin Williams, Lisa Ramsy, Lindsay Packer, James Kirkpatrick, Russ Pope, Matt Bohan, Billy Sprague, Eric Shaw, Patrick Delaney, Sam Messenger, Mike Myers, Liz Lee, Randin and Rey Isip, Jo Dery, Jake Pruin, Malena Seldin, Jessica Ward, Jason Porter, Shane Butler, Irene Cho, Neil Popkema, Chickenhead, Sto, Jim Darling, James Brown, Koen Holtcap, Max Williams, Rick Charnoski, Lea Friedman, Jenna Rose Sands, Dan Weise, Kristen Cutlip, Torey Quinonez, Pax Americana, Pasquaie Lino Reca, Oliver Halsman Rosenberg, Melissa Ip, Irene Halsman, Andy Cvar, Daze, Gigi Chew, Sean Livingstone, Scott Mou, Chuck Bettis, Daniel Givins, Tom Messenger, Chris Keeler, Rebecca Hale, Kim Scarfuro, Spencer Herbst, Shane Williams, Ben Jenkins, Peter Van Hyning, F. Mathias Lorenz, Marie Lorenz & Andrea Maurer, Gregory Benton, Aaron Cantor, Carl Dunn, Rodger Stevens, Chris Shary, Caitlin Keegan, Jenna Robinson, Rob Leecock, Steve Bliss, Scott Ferguson, Amy McGrath, David Borges, Olivia Shao, Kevin Hooeyman, Rich Jacobs, Giles Lyon and Noah Lyon.

http://www.cindersgallery.com/ see some pics from the opening here http://supertouchblog.com/?p=2215

Andre the Giant has a posse 7′4″520LB… the sticker that started it all. I’ve put up my share of these little bastards, but Shepard Fairey has covered the earth with them. The last time I saw Shep he was putting them up at a rate of about 15 per minute while carrying on a conversation and walking down the street at the same time. I found it a little distracting that every time I turned to say something to him he was hanging off the top of a streetlamp or a crosswalk sign. And when the police rolled up, his wife Amanda pulled the old “Hey Shepard, let’s make out now!” trick while I made my best attempt to disassociate myself from any criminal activities.

I’ve been trading stickers & artwork with this notorious character since 1991. He started his giant takeover in 1989 and it took me a couple years to track him down. I was immediately attracted to Shepard’s work, stemming from my love of punk rock, stickers, propaganda and…well…Andre the Giant. Andre was a professional wrestler from the 80’s. There was a point when he was the most recognized sports figure in the world, second only to Muhammad Ali. The sticker image comes from a grainy picture of Andre’s face that Shepard clipped out of a newspaper. He was showing a friend how to make a stencil & just thought it looked funny.

I’ve always loved multiples. Lot’s and lots of the same thing. Over and over again. Especially if it’s a shitty zerox. I loved the fact that if I ran out of the stickers that Shepard would send me, I could just make my own on a copy machine and they would look exactly the same. That they were totally absurd made me love them even more. 17 years later knowing that there’s millions of these retarded little portraits of Andre the Giant all over the world is pretty funny. Shepard might be famous now but there are still millions of people who are completely baffled by the ubiquitous stickers.

Supply & Demand is really great. It’s a beautiful hardcover with gold embossing on it. A book that finally does justice to Shepard’s work. Clocking in at over 350 pages it’s got tons of great photo’s and reproductions. I love the surveillance shots of bombing in action. Then there are pages and pages of the aftermath. There’s lots of other stuff too, his silk-screened prints, his influences, arrest records, bootleg stickers, even some hate mail!

Obey Giant! Buy this book! http://obeygiant.com/

I really like this book, but I was having some trouble reviewing this until I had a talk with my good friend Alan Watts. Then it all became clear. The Drips is a good look into the conflict of the wiggly world versus the prickly world. Man, with lots of numbers, facts and straight lines, constructs the prickly world. Architects are prickle people. Lawyers are prickly people. Politicians are prickly people but they do a lot of wiggling to capture the hearts and the minds of the gooey people. Artists tend to be wiggly types with their romantic ideals, non-linear thinking and gooey globs of paint. When it comes down to it, life is really about gooey prickles and prickly goo. Life is about the sea’s wiggly waves splashing against straight shores. It’s about the rays of the sun bouncing off the hard concrete in a heat wave.

The Drips consists mostly of portraits of people melting in an atmosphere of straight lines. Taylor has told me he wants to live in the desert. The only prickle things there are the cacti. And the cacti are only prickly to protect their gooey insides. People are like this too. We are all just fleshy blobs with big brains that make think we can rule the world. When in fact, we are all just melting under the sun. As prickle people poke holes in the ozone we all melt. The mighty rays of the sun melt the poles of the ends of the earth. Then the ice drips, the rain drips, the mud drips and our skin drips.

My favorite drawing in this book is of a cassette melting out of a dilapidated car stereo. The molten hamburger is awesome too. Taylor’s book leaves us asking the question “Who left the cake out in the rain?” or better yet “Who left your face out in the rain?”

2006, hand-made, two-color zerox plus inkjet. About 50 of these were made, and dropped off at locations like Jim Hanley’s Universe on 33rd St. in NYC, Rocketship Comics in Brooklyn, and Trance Pop in Kyoto, Japan. No copies currently available, not sure when or if more will be made, but look here for updates… www.taylormckimens.com The Drips comic book is available from www.pictureboxinc.com